Sussian

“HOP ON POP”
by Gerard C. Smith

Come "Hop on Pop," my Lisa said
And hop of course is what she did
Her brother joined in with a jump
On Poppa’s tum he went crash-bump
Lisa hopped and hopped some more
She knocked poor Poppa to the floor
Both kids did bounce, each up and down
Poor Pop was trounced and he did frown
Now he hates that bastard T. Geisel
And hopes the rotter roasts in hell

Boom!

Sometimes the Gun Won’t Do
By GC SMITH

Raccoons have been
climbing on my boat
leaving muddy prints
and lumpy poo

if I get my rifle out
its boom will say
more than
shoo

Deer are chomping
on foundation plants
eating all the pretty
flowers

if I get my rifle out
its boom will say
more than
shoo

Sleek, fat marsh rats
can swim on in to shore
on a high spring tide
and wreak havoc in their wake

if I get my rifle out
its boom will say
more than
shoo

But what’s a guy to do
when white grub worms
chomp on the roots
of his lawn’s greening grasses

if I get my rifle out
it won’t say what I want
shootin’ at worms in springtime
would be a boneheaded thing to do

So, I guess it’s call
the lawn service guy
an expert with a bag of tricks
that does not include a rifle

He’ll do in the grubs
I won’t know how
but I’ll know that’s
why I pay him

My lawn will flourish
with grub worms gone
and my rifle safely
locked up in a closet

So a moral that you can take
from this springtime tale of woe
is that guns and bullets
ain’t always the way to go