Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Roadhouse Redneck Roughnecks

Somebody's Baby

The crowd here at Sonny's Country Lounge is humongus. Stampin' their feet and yellin' for more. The pretty little blond gal throws them kisses and comes down off the stage. She ain't bad lookin' in her miniskirt and fringed leather vest, white cowgirl boots. Nice rack, she looks kinda like a young Dolly. But, I don't get the crowd wantin' more of her. She ain't got the voice. Hers is kinda thin, reedy. She's just okay as an opener. Ain't gonna be a hard act to follow.

I wrote a new piece an' I got a three piece country band backin' me an' my guitar. Aaron Priestly, Bass Guitar, Hank McCoy, Pedal Steel, and Lester "Moon Pie" O'Shaunnesy, Percussion. We got our music pumpin' through Mesa-Boogie amps. Dim stage lights set the mood.

Me and my boys get up on the stage to take the little blond gal's place. It's a perfect night for me to debut "Somebody's Baby”.

I take a slug of Bud from a longneck, hit a few licks on my Telecaster, turn to the boys, and nod. Lester lays down a beat and Aaron comes in with the bass line. Hank brings on the melody, takes it up tempo, and I count time until I can pick up with the lyrics.

Okay, now.

Someday soon I'll be somebody's baby
Have a woman to rock me all night long
Love words will pass from her cherry lips
She'll carry me on home with her sweet song

Won't have to be lonesome alla of my life
Cause I know just what's in store for me
Someday I'm gonna be somebody's baby
When someday comes I'm gonna be free

I din't think we'd be needin' this chicken wire cage but, damm, they're throwin' empty longnecks an' all kind of other crap at us.

"Crank it up louder boys," I shout:

Someday, I'll be somebody's baby
Have a gal to hold me in her arms
I'll look up into my sweet lady's eyes
I'll tell her all about her many charms

Someday, I'm gonna be somebody's baby
Soon, I'll be singin' and it won't be long
Country boy singin' the words she wants
Croonin' the verse to our fine love song

Someday soon I'll be somebody's baby
Someday soon I'll be somebody's baby
Someday ...

I thought tonight was the perfect time for me to introduce "Somebody's Baby'. Them beer bottles, Bar-B-Que rib bones, dirty plates, an' other stuff flyin' toward us guys up on the stage is tellin' a purely different story. Seems this here crowd's done decided Somebody's Baby sucks.

Now the crowd's yellin' for the little blondie. Yup, on second thought, maybe she does have a good voice. I pull the mike toward me and say, ``Come on up here darlin'," and wave the little blondie forward. Then, quiet like, I whisper to her, "sing sumpthin' 'bout hurtin' hearts or trains or pickup trucks. Any damn thing that'll sooth this 'effen' beast."

Maybe that sweet gal can turn the trick. Calm these wild bastards down. Just maybe, she'll get us out of this joint alive.


Martin Heavisides said...

Personally, even if I'd disliked the song, I wouldn't have expressed my criticism in quite this boisterous way. (For one thing it's a waste of whatever beer's left in a bottle--or are the critics in this place prudent, and chug first before they chuck? Anyway, fun piece, and not a bad song lyric for my money.

GC SMITH said...

They chug then chuck. Thanks Martin.